Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Week 4: Cheesy MTC jokes and mispoken phrases

Zdravo moj družina!
Let's get the ball rolling with some MTC jokes:
You wanna know how rough the toilet paper at the MTC is? The toilet paper is so rough at the MTC, that the other day I walked into the bathroom and stumbled upon a blind elder trying to read it.
Can you believe that it's already been a month? The weeks are starting to pass faster than an MTC chimichanga! (kind of gross....edit out if you'd like) ;)
Anyways, this week seriously has gone by pretty fast. Just to tell you a few events:
The other day we were teaching our investigator Božtijan (Brat J), and we decided that we would teach him about the plan of salvation (Načrt Odrešitve). The lesson lasted 45 minutes and elder S and I felt like it went pretty well....Well we got out and the first thing Brat J asked us was (sorry for the lack of punctuation. I'm using a slovene setting so I can get the right characters, but I don't know where some of the punctuation marks are) "What's the word for Earth?" We replied, "želmja". He just lauged and said, "Žemlja kaj to pomeni (Žemlja means) dinner roll. The word for Earth is Zemlja." We felt so dumb. We spent 45 minutes telling him that God sent us to live on a giant dinner roll. We laughed quite a bit about it though. We also were putting the word telo (body) into the wrong plural form. It's irregular and so instead of two bodies being "tela" its "telosa"...... "tela" which we were using means calf...like a baby cow. So we spent a lesson teaching about how Heavenly father gave us calves so we could go live on some giant dinner roll........rookie mistake I guess.
That was the funniest part of my week. I'm glad we did that one now instead of in the field.
My response to your email:
That sucks about the glasses, Dad...... time for some lasik I guess. Make sure you get either Harry Potter glasses or giant old man glasses. That's also cool about the watch and the newish ipad. I want to see a picture of the watch. My new teacher, Brat S (he got back from his mission in December and just got hired) has a really sweet black Nixon that I'm pretty jealous of.
I'm glad that you were able to find the shot records. I'm not sure why they are such a big deal....especially since I have the second date.
That's slabo (bad) news about the talk. We have to prepare a five minute talk every Sunday and then they pick who gives it during the meeting....so you always have to prepare. But, luckily we are in an English branch, so we dont have to speak Slovene.
The devotional last week was really cool. They dedicated 5 new buildings and talked about the 50 year history of missionary training in Provo. Elder Holland talked about how we have a "solemn responsibility to honor the sacred tradition of missionary work from those who went before us." Elder Nelson mentioned that we all stand tall on the shoulders of giants that have gone before us and talked about the super successful missionaries in england after the founding of the church. It was pretty cool.
I ended up buying the razor. I got it for $65 with discount. It was orgininally 110. I used it this morning and it seems to be pretty awesome.
So far I've gotten a few letters. Stuff from all of you, Josh and Amanda, Bishop, Jake, Kai, Nate, and a package from the Gunters today. It's really cool. They sent me some drink mix (the packet singles) a mini pool table, a tide to go pen, and some candy. It was really awesome to get a completely unexpected package.
So to tell you about my excursion to the police station to get fingerprints. The best for last:
So the travel office called me down during class to tell me that I would be leaving on the shuttle at 5:15 to go to the Provo police department. I went to the travel office at that time with Elder S and we got on the shuttle. We had to hurry because the police only do 20 a day, and they were almost full. So the shuttle dropped us off and then took two other missionaries to fill a prescription somewhere. They came back like 10 minutes later while we were still in line to ask if we were done. We told them that we were no where close and we didn't know when we would be done, so the shuttle left....and it never came back. The MTC forgot about us and completely ditched us at the police station. It gets better. We were talking to an somewhat active guy inside about missions and stuff and it was cool. Then we were talking to a lady that teaches here. I also ran into Matthew Cole and his wife. After I got printed we went outside ot wait for the shuttle and a crazy old guy passed by us and said "This is a weird place for a couple of people like you to be at." We just laughed and agreed. Well he came back out a couple of minutes later and asked us "So what's the good word elders?" We asked him what he wanted to hear about and he told us that he was a inactive and that the church was all about politics and money and the leaders were out to steal our money through tithes. We were shocked and tried to tell him off with out being rude. Then he started talking about how he wanted to pay tithing, but his social worker wouldn't give him the money. Then he started talking about how 75% of people in Utah County belong in jail because they are criminals and shady people. Then he started saying that the us troops could be 75% of the atheletes in the olympics and how back in 2002 Mitt Romney was involved in a money scheme/cover up with the olympics and ripped everyone off. Then he started telling us about is small business and how he's going to school at UVU (go figure, huh?)....
Weird to say the least. We finally broke away, went inside tried calling the MTC again, got through, and they said that they would send security over to pick us up. We were there for over 2 hours when it was supposed to take a half hour. And then we had to go back out this morning for a money order.
Good news....we got everything done. And attractive girls/ girls my age still exist. I thought that they had all died and that I just didn't know it. But now that I know they're still there, I'm wondering why they aren't writing me. ;)
Anyways, I better get going. I might get back on later tonight or write a letter home.
Same time, same place next week.

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